Some lucky ladies may have a man at home always armed with a bottle of oil, candles and willing and able fingers. But if you're like me, the love of your life may be a little lacking in the TLC department. I don't get much more than a furrowed brow of vague concern when I lament about the deep aching pain in my ass that's causing me to shuffle around the apartment like an 80 year old.
So consider my delight when I found Jane Austen's 3 hour Prenatal Partners workshop listed in Yoga Tree. The mere mention of prenatal massage had me entering my Credit Card info to pay the $70 couple fee. And I've been eagerly awaiting the class ever since.
Yesterday was the workshop and it went above and beyond all my expectations and desires. I've been taking Jane's prenatal classes for a few weeks now (highly recommended as well - she is awesome), so I knew we'd be in good hands. The workshop included, relaxation techniques, different massages and different possible positions done together during labor.
The most important aspect of the workshop was that it was a real bonding experience. I haven't felt this close to my husband in a while. When you're wrapped up in your pregnancy, it's very much a personal experience and for many men it's an outsider's experience. Personally, one of the challenges I've faced during pregnancy is feeling alone in what I experience physically and emotionally. I've poured hours into pregnancy and birthing books whereas R has not yet opened the Birthing Partners book I got him months ago. Seeing what I perceived as his lack of enthusiasm and eagerness to learn has been really frustrating and disappointing to me. I have to constantly remind myself that his experience is different from mine. And as much as he can't relate to me, neither can I to him.
Sunday opened a new door to equal ground. I don't know about the other partners in the room, but I know that the things Jane said resonated with R. I finally felt like he was completely present with me, undistracted by work or other issues. He was there and he was there totally supporting me. And sure the massage techniques kicked ass (and I'll be sure he keeps practicing them), but feeling his presence, his dedication and his love was what really counted. She was able to let him get to a place where he could connect to his love for me and for this baby, something that I feel he doesn't often have time to reflect on.
My hope is that all expecting couples get to share in something like this. Especially if you're feeling a bit on the disconnected side with your partner. Sometimes all we need is a little help to clear away all the noise to get down to the real love shared in a relationship. And as Jane said, a little massage with the right intention goes a long, long way.
Click here for more info on Jane Austin.
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